Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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