4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Never underestimate the power of titties
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
