trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I don't deserve a penis
Everclear isn't food dammit
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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