Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Randomize
