Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
