I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize