I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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