Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes

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  (248): Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes http://tfl.nu/lrst
  Replies (1) Good night (1945) Bad night (560)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  what's the vibe there?

  (917): View more from New York City

  extraordinary amounts of gine

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  (814): what's the vibe there? (917): extraordinary amounts of gine http://tfl.nu/dj53
  Replies (11) Good night (1861) Bad night (603)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?

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  (908): so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts? http://tfl.nu/ocmm
  Replies (49) Good night (1475) Bad night (5915)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?

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  (603): he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float? http://tfl.nu/0v16
  Replies (21) Good night (925) Bad night (5205)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality

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  (336): I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality http://tfl.nu/g1bs
  Replies (73) Good night (1469) Bad night (12873)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.

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  (209): You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him. http://tfl.nu/xni0
  Replies (15) Good night (4013) Bad night (1420)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night

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  (206): buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night http://tfl.nu/bj1f
  Replies (7) Good night (2972) Bad night (756)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"

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  (412): It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion" http://tfl.nu/m0wm
  Replies (8) Good night (627) Bad night (1751)
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.

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  (641): I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich. http://tfl.nu/1t3s
  Replies (5) Good night (992) Bad night (661)
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  (315): View more from New York

  Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?

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  (315): Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room? http://tfl.nu/jfto
  Replies (10) Good night (1670) Bad night (531)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it

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  (+44): I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it http://tfl.nu/yi0x
  Replies (7) Good night (1235) Bad night (689)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny

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  (203): Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny http://tfl.nu/4qb9
  Replies (9) Good night (3986) Bad night (843)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.

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  (913): My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one. http://tfl.nu/ad80
  Replies (9) Good night (1129) Bad night (971)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party

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  (732): Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party http://tfl.nu/r6wq
  Replies (0) Good night (685) Bad night (316)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Just skip

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Please. i have SOME standards

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  (479): Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day. (501): Just skip (479): Please. i have SOME standards http://tfl.nu/0muv
  Replies (0) Good night (860) Bad night (314)

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