Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
