wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize