the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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