some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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