nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
