She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize