Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize
