You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Tornado booty call.. dedication
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Randomize
