margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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