what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
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He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize