So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Randomize
