Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
