would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
