i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
