Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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