accomplished twins. life is a go
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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