Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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