Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
