You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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