so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
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Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
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Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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