Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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