She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize