Whod you bang
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
