she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
