I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize