I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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