The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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