No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize