STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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