we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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