You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
