Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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