when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
