It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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