tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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