can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I could make wine with my vomit
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
