im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Is Oprah even human
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
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