what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize