You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
