She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
