I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Randomize
