these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
She bit a glass in half.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Randomize
