Who did Billy Mays play for?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
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